The trend is going around social media about “romanticizing your life” and acting as if you are the “main character”. The phenomenon of romanticizing your life consists of “ appreciating” or “over-romanticizing” your mundane daily tasks such as taking that extra effort to make everything more so-called “ aesthetic”. The trend of over-romanticizing your life started out due to the COVID-19 pandemic when everyone was locked inside their own house and had nothing to stare at besides the 4 walls of their house. Human interaction was limited, leading people to the downfall of many. There wasn’t much you could do in your house, the same house you were in a day ago and a year ago. It was obvious, people weren’t okay. The phenomenon created an escape for many, an escape from reality, the same reality of being in the same 4 walls unable to do anything about it as the uncertainty and anxiety take over. As a result of this, everyone started becoming the “main character”. At first glance, it seems extremely harmless or helpful, but that’s not always the case.
I can’t lie and say I haven’t tried romanticizing my life after seeing those aesthetic TikTok of girls with seemingly perfect lives living in NYC with their perfect matcha lattes on their bedside tables. Don’t get me wrong there’s nothing wrong with this, in fact, I’m thrilled that her life looks like that- maybe even a little envious. But if this is really the standard for a “main-character” life, doesn’t this put many in the dark? Think about it, the many activities of the “main-character” girls consist of pilates, yoga, walks with their $500 headphones, and an overpriced matcha latte and you cannot forget their skincare routine which costs more than it should. What’s the common denominator between all these things? It suggests that to be able to over-romanticize your life you need all these things which cost a fortune. Sometimes, people are put in circumstances in which they can’t afford all this, and maybe instead of pilates they do cycling, and instead of matcha they drink just pure water. Does this mean they aren’t able to be the “main character”?
The whole point of romanticizing your life is to make your life just a little more tolerable, suggesting that you’re the one who chose to not enjoy your life and that “fixing your mindset” is going to change everything as if it were a choice in the first place. Just simply telling someone who’s going through the worst time of their life because of an uncontrollable situation to just “ change your mindset” or “ think positive” is quite naive or in fact a little offensive to them. The main characters in movies always romanticize their life. From looking out the window to walking extra slowly to view the scenery in their own backyard, they have it easy since in the end everything usually works out for them. It’s hard not to question being the “main character” when the biggest issue a main character has in a movie is crying over a guy while still looking pretty looking out from a penthouse inside Manhattan and getting back together with the guy at the end either way. But human life doesn’t work like that, our lives don’t always work out but we’re the ones who have to make it work. Even if we were going through the same situation or emotion as the main characters in the movie, the intensity and depth of our emotions can’t even compare. Adding on, “overly-romanticizing” your life can sometimes be too far. The constant need to feel like you are watched or that what you do matters can really affect your self-esteem. You may make decisions based on how the outcome looks more so than what is actually necessary. In a way you are sort of living in your own delusions, a movie only you can see. But then why do people do this? This again stems from the pandemic, a time of uncertainty. Being able to control what you do and feeling what you do matters and that everything is captured gives you back a sense of control but what this phenomenon does is it makes you suppress your emotions, it suggests you shouldn’t feel this way and staying in bed all day is unacceptable. Since again, movie characters don’t feel what you feel, the feeling of fatigue doesn’t even exist to them.
With all this said, maybe being the “main character” isn’t always a bad thing. As mentioned before the whole point of this is to make life a little more bearable. So to a certain extent, it is a good thing to do since it teaches you to find joy everywhere you go and to appreciate the little things in life. But with this, you’ll need to be extremely mindful not to get too carried away chasing happiness in a life that is too over-exaggerated can lead to a steep and spiraling downfall. There is nothing wrong but being in your own world and doing things that look good but once you start doing those things for the sole purpose of how it looks where there might be an issue, use the tactic of overly-romanticizing your life to add and improve your life not as a coping mechanism.